Can balance actually exist?

My company, all my professional networking groups, and everything I read about happiness for the career-focused, purpose-driven woman touted balance as the solution to all my problems. 

And while the idea of balance always seemed dreamy and idyllic, there’s something about it that eluded me for years.

Everywhere I looked I saw women living and working in extremes.  They were either ALL IN or ALL OUT.   Was anyone really "making this work"?

Look, I know balance is a touchy subject... and for good reason.  

You might be adamantly for it or ready to scream at the top of your lungs that it's total BS.

Maybe you're tossing around phrases like "work life integration", because that simple change helps you sleep at night.  You can call it whatever you want.  

The truth is... we all want the same damn thing:  

We want to stop feeling guilty about the life
we're missing out on when we're working and we want to stop feeling guilty about the living we're doing when we "should be" working.  


IF YOU'RE CRAVING BALANCE BUT LETTING BURNOUT AND EXHAUSTION RUN THE SHOW...

IF YOU'RE MISSING OUT ON IMPORTANT MOMENTS WITH YOUR FAMILY BECAUSE OF WORK...

IF YOU'RE CONSTANTLY FEELING OVERWHELMED AND PULLED IN A MILLION DIFFERENT DIRECTIONS...


IF YOU’RE PUTTING EVERYONE ELSE’S NEEDS AHEAD OF YOUR OWN... 

IF YOU'RE WEIGHED DOWN BY GUILT... AT WORK... & AT HOME...


NOW is the time to make a change.

And I’ve compiled all the strategies and resources you need to make this transition simple.


Happiness is not a matter of intensity but of balance.
— Thomas Merton

Here’s How I Got Here (& why I want to help)

A handful of years ago, I was in the midst of aggressively driving my career forward, working 80 hours a week, while going to grad school part-time and seriously, seriously hating my life.  

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Nothing I did ever felt like enough, but I was beyond exhausted by constantly pushing for the NEXT thing.  My marriage was failing and the more stressed I got, the faster the number on the scale climbed.  I desperately wanted to leave my mark on the world, but THIS WAS NOT WHAT I SIGNED UP FOR

I’d been taught my whole life that working hard was the single most important factor in being successful, so I worked my ass off.

Working HARDER than anyone else is what I brought to the table. 

That’s what I thought would get me ahead.  And, sure, I ended up very successful.  But outward success didn’t seem to translate inward. 

I was miserable and my body was SCREAMING at me to pay attention: I packed on pounds, balanced my alcohol cravings with equal doses of caffeine, and suffered from that ‘tired but wired’ feeling that kept me up half the night.

 

I FELT SO BURNT OUT.

SO OVERWHELMED

SO TIRED

SO UNAPPRECIATED

SO ANGRY.  

SO GUILTY.

SO MISUNDERSTOOD.

SO DESPERATE TO "MAKE IT WORK".  
 

AND SO FRUSTRATED
THAT I WAS DOING ALL
THE
“RIGHT” THINGS
AND YET I WAS SO UNHAPPY.


But at the same time...

I was conflicted

Despite the long hours, I actually loved my job and I didn't want to give up everything I'd worked so hard for, but I doubted I could maintain a successful career and balance any semblance of a personal life.

The reality was I just couldn’t wrap my head around how to align my strong work ethic and desire to be successful with the lifestyle I craved - a happy marriage, an awesome social life, and the down time I knew I needed to really care for my mind & body. 

I couldn't see a way out.

So, I quit my job.  

It saved my failing marriage and my waistline, but it lead me into a professional tailspin that had me hopping from job to job to job

I wouldn't wish that on anybody... but I sure did learn a lot during that time.  

When I look back, everything that I've learned since shows me that it wasn’t the job that needed to change.  It was me. 


We are often at war with ourselves...
You have to find that balance
between your heart and your mind.
— Anonymous

After quitting, I spent the next 5 years learning everything I could about what I needed to do to have a successful career & a balanced, happy life. I hired a life coach, studied yoga and nutrition, volunteered around the world, got crystal clear on my work and life values, started lifting weights, and did the “inner work” to manage my workaholic tendencies.

Now, I live a truly balanced life - a career I love, an incredible marriage, stress-free time to enjoy family and friends, & the time and space to care for myself.  I still work hard, but now I do it on my terms and with the knowledget that I can’t deliver my best work if I’m not hitting the pause button every now and then.

 If you are questioning if there's a better way for you to be successful, 
I can assure you there is. BALANCE CAN EXIST, BUT YOU HAVE TO CREATE IT FOR YOURSELF. (Don’t worry - I’m here to help!)


Resources:

Visit the blog. for guidance on all things balance inducing. More coming soon.


About Me:

Aquarian by birth,
Engineer by training,
Data Analyst by day,
Deep Sleeper by night,
Writer by divine inspiration

I’m based in Philadelphia, PA with my husband, Mike, and our three cats, Eenie, Cat Benatar, and Biggie.  I’m a 5 on the Enneagram and an INTJ on the Myers Briggs. When I’m not working, I spend my time crossfitting, listening to true crime podcasts, drinking soy lattes, taste-testing donuts, reading all things personal development, and enjoying tall, dark, and handsome beers. 

Access my full professional bio here.

 
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